chapter one maybeh?

Second week of school. Joy. It just thrills me to go back, especially after the tantalizing three-day weekend they dangle in front of us right after week one. Sometimes I wonder about the people who run schools.

    Well, I walked down to the bus-stop, as usual (i suppose, anyway) and the first thing I noticed is the the four Asian girls who usually are lined up there by 8:10AM aren't there. Well, just cuz I did a chore right before I left, doesn't mean I missed the bus - it comes at about 8:20-8:30, and it was just now 8:13. Shrugging this off (or trying to) I pulled out my MP3 (god, i wish i had more than just 1/2 of a gig of storage)  and plugged in. Sounds of morning were only dampaned by the music - i always keep it pretty low, having no wish to lose my hearing at the young age of 15. How sad would that be?

    A showed up one song later (a three minute and 1/2 long one), and i pulled out one earbud and we got to talking. First topic - where were the other people? weren't they usually always here? I told her I had no idea, but I didn't think we'd missed the bus. Five minutes later, the bus appeared 'round the corner, and off to school we went, like obedient little peoples. The trip actually takes about ten-fifteen minutes, but I refuse to regaile you with my tales of the five songs I listened to. I know - so sad, too bad.

    We got off the bus, and waved 'ciao' (goodbye for all you losers who don't know italian/spanish), and I entered the ugly building that is my high school. A immediately demanded a hug, and to know how my weekend was, and then another hug, but I felt rather awkward the whole conversation as he'd been talking to a group of friends, and had quite suddenly cut off all conversation with them to talk to me. I might understand if we were going out, but I've already told him 'no'. After all, it's not like he could've dated S and me at the same time without one of us/both of us finding out. Come on. Girls AREN'T that thick.

    Then I entered the sanctuary of my inner circle of friends, and had just glomped j and v, when l grabbed me and took me with her to the library. we had a very serious discussion about her possible date and when r was gonna introduce them and so on, and the whole time, i kinda felt a little miserable inside as I know the likelihood of me having a date was slim to none. It's not like I don't have anyone I could ask, i just refuse to go with guys I don't actually have strong feelings. I would only go as a friend, but sometimes guys can read things where girls don't see anything and vise-versa. It's just too complicated. Besides, D or H would never ask me. I think D is still taken and H is too much of a mystery - i haven't quite figured him out yet.

    we reached the library, then got her a pass, then walked back to the lunch room where we all meet, but the bell rang as soon as we got back, so I re-walked the route to library, then a hall beyond to reach my english class. Only three people were there besides myself and the teacher, normal for that early. I suppose I could have waited an extra couple minutes with my friends, but i am instinctively a nerd, so I left too early and encountered the awkward pre-class time. Ick. I don't know anyone in that class, either, so that, obviously, helps shy me bunches. and h has class with me. yeah. that helps double. i guess no one will ever hear me talk to anyone but when i answer questions or talk to a or m ( the only two i know, but then only barely and it's rather forced, to tell the truth)

   1 hour and 30 minutes later, i finished up class and moved on. It seemed to go on forever in there, but we were finally done. I think the two juniors who share my table are pretty average, but i expected them to be a bit smarter. They don't know much, but i guess that's why they're in english 2 pre-ap. one is mexican and just learned english, so i forgive her, but the football player i guess i expected more of.

   Spanish next. God it's freezing in there. Gotta remember a jacket everytime. Mostly boring, but d-d/j and c are in that class with me, so i'm alright. plus i'm not bad in spanish and it's just a review of what we learned in 2 right now, so i'm kinda coasting and reviewing depending on what does and doesn't need review. I volunteered to go first for a surprise speech we had to write in 10 minutes, and I think i got an eighty, not bad but definitely not a good start. if i wanna please my parents and maybe make them actually love me or something again, i gotta shot for 90-100s.

   another hour and 30 minutes later, choir. I love choir, but not the new director. he kept a lot of stuff from mr sir's reign, but he changed stuff too. like our do system. i would like to take this time to say that i absolutely HATE movable do. detest it, in fact. please, please, please send us back to fixed. and now back to our regularly scheduled program. I was moved down to the end of the first row, in front of Chelsea. Chelsea is sweet, and anyone other than me might like her. but her personality rubs me wrong. i'm sorry, but i don't think we can ever be close friends. but i'm too nice to be rude to her, so, despite my feelings, i helped her get music and crap as today was her first day. how she got to be in varsity without an auditon i'll never know. choir director is gay, so it wasn't that way. l and i, however, sit now half a classroom away, which makes me sad. we've never been too far apart in choir. how depressing.

    yet another hour and thirty minutos (minutes, you non-italian speaking freaks) later, it was lunch. I don't like to count the minutes in choir, but when i'm that hungry, i will. I hate having 'c' lunch. everyone may be in it, but thanks to my small stomach, i don't eat much breakfast, so it doesn't satisfy quite so long. i ate a fruit cup, animal crackers and gave my gross-tasting drink to j who loved it. how weird, eh? ah well. she then proceded to show me how to inspire fear in men - with violence and kicking. very fun. then c and i were scarred by ed, er, s and a. I hate boys. Wild monkey sex is not a topic to be discussed around me. I like my half-innocence, and would like to keep it that way. so, ed and ja worked on c and mine's happy thoughts, ruining puppies, ice cream bubbles, exit signs, outer space, chocolate, and so on. The sun and moon are unscathed - they didn't hear those last two.

    lunch, 30 minutes later, was now over. back to classes, guys. xP

    nutrition and food sci (home ec in short) is my last on white days. it's the easiest, basically i talk to big v and mc all class, and watch food movies and do a few worksheets. i can't wait till we start cooking - i really need to beef up my skillz. mac and cheese out of a box and cookies and cakes don't cut it. my desserts amaze me, but actual food doesn't.

    school day ended at 4:10. thank god. I proceeded outside, and proclaimed, quite happily, i would be unable to attend the choir camp (i think the whole thing is retarded, especially since they made it mandatory. i do have a life, and if i need to go baby-sit, what i do for money, i will. screw m) and then talked and tried to avoid being tickled by b and mi while i waited for my bus. i wish i wasn't ticklish, and didn't make 'cool noises', either. ah well. just part of what makes mario mario, i guess.

1 Kommentar 5.9.07 04:25, kommentieren

I've had a thought

I  was thinking... why didn't i just pick the bigger room, and not have to worry about the stupid a/c!?


First, it closes my door. like an auto-door thing.

second, it's always colder in my room

third, it drains to my sink, clogs it AND COVERS MY STUPID ROOM IN SINK WATER! EWWW!!

and i only notice this at 10:00 at night, so mom's pissed at me, and i .. have nowhere to sleep. but at least it wasn't really my fault. that slimy stuff in the drain proves that.

Well, as to the rest of my life, tis all good. went to the beach. there's too many people there, the sun is amazing in the morning, and lynde's coming over in about 30 min. so, i'm gonna go ahead and finish this up, cuz i really have no more news.

school starts soon...

gonna buy new clothes..

my rooms a mess/wet..

and i'm bored. byes! 

1 Kommentar 13.8.07 22:26, kommentieren


My new contacts came in. They didn't have purple/violet/indigo, so i went with grey. kinda dumb, actually, since my eyes change colour by themselves, but i mostly just wanted to see how they worked/felt, stuff like that.


That's all i really feel like writing. wow. have a nice evening! 

10.8.07 02:12, kommentieren

Sniff sniff.

My hair is cut. I asked for layers and shorter bangs and... they gave me actual bangs. i look like i did in third grade. xP

Alas... there is nothing i can do.

but - there IS good news. my stitches are gone! out! forever banished! all twelve of them! now... the understitiches must go. you know - the ones under the skin that are supposed to dissolve? well... they are annoying. but not itchy.

and i don't have to go dress shopping for homecoming. i still have that dress from the choir banquet - the 200 dollar one (and it was on sale *YIKES*), and i'm wearing that. i just need to get good shoes. better than the ones i wore to banquet. those will work but...

but, with homecoming comes - you guessed it - school. at least i get to see everyone. i might have a party, but i dunno. it'll probably be an at-home, girls maybe sleep over thing. maybe birthday, maybe back-to-school. i dunno. very undecided on that.

and i finally got a wii. i know - so lame. but at least we have one. and jess insists on leaving the 'cube plugged in. don't know why.

and that's all. laters! 

1 Kommentar 8.8.07 02:47, kommentieren

They itch like crazy.

I'm not kidding. when you have surgery, you tell me how your own stitches feel, but my (12, i think) itch like crazy. not to mention the painful, dissolving ones underneath the top ones. I can't WAIT till these things come out. plus, i have to keep them nice and clean - no swimming for me. (*cries*) showering is ... difficult, but i'm allowed to get non-chlorinated water on them, so it's better. did i mention my bro got a new super-soaker last month. that's been fun, too. ARGH!


okay. rants over. i'm better now. honestly, the worst part was the actual surgery. they kept me awake, much to my dismay. the smell was the worst, i think.


the rest of my summer's been great, though. we're about to go on a big roadtrip, camp next week, baseball game tomorrow, gonna go see the fray and the gomez, and then total relaxzation and b-day (maybeh) planning. i dunno if i'm gonna have it anymore. it's kinda late, it's been rainy, ect, ect. but, i'll still see...


and why i've been avoiding the comp? well, i don't go online bunches in the summer. it's kinda a thing i do. weird, i know, but i don't care. i don't really stay in touch over the summer. when school starts up again, don't worry, cuz i'll be online 24/7. summer, though, i'm away from my friend's soap opera lives. not that they're bad, but sometimes it's a little much. that's why i would probably never have a bf at my own school. (or, really, at all.)


but, the sims, i've discovered, can eat up HOURS of my time. and i would make an unbelievable architect. no, really. i'm amazing. (i know - so modest, but seriously, i am fairly good)

and that's all for this month.

1 Kommentar 8.7.07 02:16, kommentieren


Well, i'm officially back from camp, but i haven't been doing much. Waking up at 5 to do some driving in the mall parking lot before actually waking up, driving to friend's houses, goign out to eat, dealing with some major headaches, and crashing into imaginary parked cars. But i did drive on 620. go me.

the weather here really has me down, though. not only does rain make me want to stay inside, it also gives me some pretty bad headaches. yeah, i would love to go dancing or swimming in the rain, but between tylenol failing me more than once, and depressing rain vibes, i just haven't actually done any of that. not to mention thunder makes my dog act weird. i hope it stops soon.

what's coming up - hopefully the procedure, beth's engagement party (which i'm afraid i'm unable to make now) and uncle charley's 4th of july thing (the reason i'm not going to the party T.T)

however, despite the rain, the hole in my foot from that stupid burr thingie, and mild cramps, this week wasn't so bad. i actually managed to do something with my bro that didn't involve a TV. we played comp multiplayer games practically all week. meh - some people may say that's not much of an improvement, but to hell with them. i can't say it didn't keep me entertained.

and i bought not only two new charles de lint books (not quite so new - i buy most of his out of order) and volume one of nana. which does remind me - i need to look at that .75$ copy of demon diary. amazingly cheap, no? i find my sources ... useful. ^.^

other than that - there's not much to report. but, i did decide on one major thing during my long hours of house-bound contemplation - i don't need a bf. or, really, want one. unless i find some amazingly hot and non brain-dead guy over this break, i'm not looking for one at school any more. i can like 'em all i want, but i'm not dating them. and, no, there will be no reason given here. that's for me, only.

shrek three, by the way, don't go see it. little kids -they'll eat it up. but, seriously, just wait for the dvd. i was good, but not movie theatre great. next on the movie list - nancy drew. i swore i'd never go see it, till mom and aunt sharon both wanted to go, and carolyn told me it was actually good. so, see it i think i shall.

and now - the end of the blog. i hate ending these things - i'm never quite sure what to say. kind of like eating bread in a restaurant (which i'm not sure how its to be done, either. at least i can do everything else, eh?) either ' got to go' or 'time to eat' or 'and now i'm off to play video games'? none of those fit. more like conversation enders. ah, me. guess this'll just have to do.




(but - seriously, someone PLEASE teach me some good enders. or tips. or something. and if you know about the bread thing, tips or ideas for that might be nice. #^.^)

1 Kommentar 24.6.07 04:41, kommentieren


Well, congrats to me - i earned my permit! however, i was told i need to study my signs better. oh well... nobody's perfect.

right before i sat down to write this particular blog, i was reading this book and thinking about some stuff - nothing too serious or creepy, but containing a little of both of those - when this odd little fly showed up. ordinarily, they go away when you sho them off. this one won't go away though. and - still thinking in that particular mindset - i got the feeling that maybe i wasn't really a good person, all rotted on the inside or something, and the fly was there to tell me something. i dunno. it was really weird. next weird bit - i've walked into three different rooms, and it follow me into every one of them. stalker fly. and now i'm itchy.

oh well - suppose it'll go away eventually.

19.6.07 04:35, kommentieren